More Lessons from History: Uncovering the colourful characters of the past by Alex Deane

Author:Alex Deane
Format: epub

* Magee’s other famous quote is also helpful as we make our way through the travails of life: ‘The man who makes no mistakes does not usually make anything.’

† The Temperance movement was not without its good moments, though. Charles Gordon Maynard, the inventor of Wine Gums, was the son of a teetotal Methodist and supposedly created this popular sweet to aid those wishing to avoid alcohol. Good outcome.

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CHAPTER 56

GET INTO THE WEEDS

The Special Boat Service – motto, ‘By Strength and Guile’ these days, and once the more evocative ‘Not by Strength, by Guile’ – owes its formation to a formidable commando named Roger Courtney, who maintained that small teams of men using foldable kayaks could do great harm to the enemy.

He demonstrated this in the face of great doubts by using one to sneak unnoticed aboard an infantry landing ship, scrawl his initials in the captain’s cabin and steal a deck gun cover, which he presented to the next officer to tell him complacently that such things couldn’t be done.

Thus it was that he was permitted to explore the possibilities of small-group commando operations, and what was to become the Special Boat Service began in 1940.

Courtney wanted his men to be able to live off the land during operations. So, in 1942, he invited a famous eccentric called Jim Branson – as it happens, Richard Branson’s great-uncle* – to teach his little group of teak-hard commandos how it is done.

Branson had parcelled out his large estate in Hampshire amongst his tenants, and at this point lived in Balham, where he lived mainly on grass. He had offered Courtney a training session, and Courtney offered to pay his rail fare up to Scotland but received no reply to his offer.

142Instead, a week after Courtney’s correspondence had gone unanswered, a little gnome of a fellow arrived in Ardrossan by bicycle. He had cycled the 500 miles in a week, and was sorry for being a bit late as he’d stopped a couple of times to have some seaweed.

The good men of the nascent SBS should have realised at this point what they were getting themselves into, and probably did.

Branson’s teaching, supposedly based upon a Japanese method of living off the land as one passed through it, was along these lines.

Hedge weeds are good eating, as long as they lack gaudy flowers. They’re best found in the shade. Maintained lawns and greens are to be avoided unless you like your meals served with mower oil.

Once you’ve got your weeds, you mix them with small amounts of sugar, oatmeal and vinegar – or milk if you’ve got no vinegar. And that’s it. That’s your food.

Branson demonstrated this by promptly preparing and eating some weeds pulled from the ground upon which they stood. There you are, boys… Nothing to it!

The hunky men of Courtney’s command were sceptical, but their whole endeavour was based upon trying new things – so, tuck in lads, let’s give this a go.

Normal rations were stopped. The men ate grass and weeds for three days.

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